Sunday, December 23, 2007

Exurbcakes: A Recipe

Brain Lab query: "What happens when flavor imitates life?"

-3 sq. ft. richly tanned leather
-10 lbs. wet stucco, preferably dyed a frosting-like shade of pink or yellow
-5 lbs. Starbucks Espresso Roast ("Starbucks Coffee: Roasted over burning SUV tires!")
-1 box Franzia Vintner Select White Zinfandel
-Assorted Elton John, Barry Manilow, Kenny G, and NOW! compilation CDs
-1 pair pleated khaki shorts

-Combine stucco and espresso in a large cement truck; process mixture into a viscous paste.
-Shape mixture into uniform circles (1" diameter is ideal), wrap with strips of leather.
-Remove CDs from cases--the cases may later be used for a creative presentation--and crush discs up into little shards. Sprinkle atop cakes to taste.
-Place cakes on car roof; pick a sunny day to drive around doing errands for 9 hours, using only outdoor parking options.
-Smoke over shreds of khaki shorts for extra flavor.
-Serve with energy drinks, Ensure, or any of Pepsi's "Jazz"-variety colas.

"Take A Ride To Exurbia": David Brooks, The New York Times, Nov. 9, 2004

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